Greta Thunberg — devoted Kremlin agent

In politics two rules are always carefully followed. First, if you can’t understand what’s and why is happening — it’s all about money. Second: if they show you a child — you will definitely be robbed. Therefore, it’s quite easy to predict how it all will end… One moment you become witness of sudden, violent attacks of love for nature, ecology, birds and butterflies, and then all of the sudden an angry girl with pigtails is introduced onto the stage, shouting at the mighty of this world: “How dare you?! ”, — and they clap for her.

In general, pop op of a child on any political arena has the same meaning as the phrase of Ataman Gritian Tavrichesky “I with my boys all stand as one for a freedom of personality!” — which means — they will try to rob you. Now, when we understand general situation, it’s time to answer the most important questions. Who will rob? Whom? How?

A few days ago it was presumed that Russians will become victims of this global robbery. Here how Russian RBC presented it when talked about the very meaning of future “carbon tax”: “EU carbon tax, once it’ll come into force, could cost Russian suppliers of iron, steel, aluminum and fertilizers at least € 1.1 billion a year,. This follows from calculations of RBC, certified by the Ministry of Economic Development.”

However, at the very end of the article, RBC’s economy experts revealed the mechanism for collecting this tax: “Carbon tax is just a formal name for it: in fact, importers of goods to the European Union will buy special certificates and exchange them for the right to import carbon-intensive products. Direct obligation to pay the tax will lie not on Russian residents, but on companies importing products into the EU … “

So, how it will look in practice? An increase in utility rates, vanishing of meat from grocery stores (cause cows and pigs farts highly contribute to global warming) and an increase in the cost of any product produced in the EU. For automotive industry, this increase will be quite significant.

Well, now have a full picture of bent and hairy legs sticking out from under Greta’s skirt. But how it will affect Russia? The most energy-intensive industries in Europe and the United States, that use a lot of steel, produce cars, turbines, agricultural fertilizers, will be too expensive to operate in EU and the US. It will be more profitable to move them to places where they are able have materials and cheep energy, to avoid carbon tax.

“Greens” with their little lady from Sweden, will move industry to Russia and China. However, there’s no shortage of workers in China, while in Russia this shortage is quite an issue — and this is a great news for European and American workers and engineers who are currently working at European and American enterprises.

Very soon, many of them will be introduced with Russian way of life: no “green” propaganda, no BLM, no mandatory gay propaganda for children in schools, low utility bills, and the stores are full of steaks. The new barbecue capital will be moved to Vasyuki town.

Russia will become an exclusive country that provide its citizens with the American lifestyle of 1950s: with a grill on the lawn, three children and a woman in a dress. Plus maternity capital, a good public health and a social package.

Of course, fighters for everything progressive will spit on this, demanding introduction of a carbon tax and a ban on meat farming. They will start wringing their hands and asking the whole world for forgiveness for us. At that time we will eat steaks, pat children on the heads and wink at the bust of Greta Thunberg standing in the sideboard.

In the meantime, capitalists who have not been convinced by the forced sale of carbon indulgences and still have some patriotism, will be convinced by “greens” in other ways. As The New York Times reports — “US Democrats demand $ 500 Billion from Climate Negative Companies,”.

In other words, US Democrats destroying its own energy independence. “But why? After all, this is bad happened for the US! “ — the surprised Russian will say. Yes, this is bad for the United States, but it’s good for the sponsors of the Democrats. For cheaters selling so called “green technology”, flying carpets, genie lamps, self-made soy tablecloths, burial potion and Dr. Wof-Hu’s tincture.

In order for these miracles to work, every green gin will have to somehow unnoticed build a nuclear power plant and behind each soybean, self-assembly and eco-friendly fertilizer plant. Besides, all of this will be our reactors and our factories. So let’s clink glasses with our steaks for our little Swedish girl Greta and for the “freedom of personality”!

Translation and audio: Danielius Karkozas